Oh, Me of Little Faith

Well, if you've read the previous post, you know I had a disgustingly frustrating afternoon. After trying it on my own for a couple hours, I did in fact pray before tackling it again. Surprise, surprise, it worked. It worked within 15 minutes, in fact. Why do I ever attempt to do anything without praying first? Seriously. How many times does this have to happen before I just begin everything I do with a prayer? I think maybe I've been beaten over the head with it enough that it will change my actions this time. I hope so. I always catch myself thinking that I should be able to handle/do things on my own and that I'm "bothering" God by asking for help. Now, really, just how absurd is that? As a parent, if one of my daughters is having a rough time, I want to help them. I don't want them to struggle with anything unnecessarily. Granted, sometimes struggling teaches a much-needed lesson. But sometimes I struggle with things only because I don't want to ask for help. Is it pride? Maybe. Is it that I don't feel like I deserve help? Very possibly. But just by being God's child I have an unfathomable amount of help, love and support wrapped around me, ready for the taking. All I have to do is ask. So from now on, pray first, then do. Pray first, then do. Easy, right?

NOT a Plumber...

So there seems to be some sort of misunderstanding here. For the record, I am NOT a plumber. I'm pretty sure when I applied for the job of "Mom" I didn't see that on the job description. With good reason, as I wouldn't have signed up for this gig if I had known I was going to be responsible for the household plumbing needs. I have spent the day giving it my all with mixed results. I replaced the inner workings of my (and the girls') toilet and then went to work on Dad's. Just like the man who uses it, it is difficult, to say the least. Kidding, Honey! :) It couldn't just work like it should. It couldn't make it easy on me. It had to have a defect that causes it to leak. Yes, it is a defect and not repair-woman error. Believe me, I have seen every nook and cranny it has to offer and I know I've found the problem. While identifying the problem is a step in the right direction, it hasn't helped me figure out how to rig it so it will work without leaking. It's not something I can just work around, either. My head hurts, my hands are raw from loosening and tightening and I want to give up. If I was a cussing person, I would be spewing expletives left and right. But I'm not. Maybe I'll turn to prayer instead...it can't hurt. I would really like to accomplish SOMETHING today. Would that be too much to ask?

Back to Almost Normal

I am almost back to my old self again. I had my 1 week post-op check and learned that the pathology report was good. All it showed was endometriosis on the things they removed.

We've had a good day today. It's always nice to feel like I've really accomplished something. Some days I feel like I'm just chasing my tail all day long. I clean up one mess only to find it again an hour later. Not today! I didn't do anything particularly exciting, but made vegetable soup, have homemade noodles waiting to be put in the soup to cook and have a double batch of peanut butter cookies in the fridge ready to be baked in the morning so I can stick them in the freezer. It seems like cookies always taste better out of the freezer - maybe it's just because Grandma always had cookies in her freezer. Whatever the reason, I try to keep some ready for any little angel who decides she's in the mood for a cookie. I want to do more freezer cooking in the upcoming weeks/months and hope to post my meal plans on here. It'll be helpful for me to keep track of what we have from one week to the next. It will also help to be more organized where our meals are concerned. I've done it before, so I know it's possible! Wish me luck!

OUCH!!!

I am two days past surgery and am finally able to be up moving for more than a few minutes. I, hold on to your hats, even showered today. It took until this morning just to get brave enough to pull off all five band-aids. The first one wasn't so bad as it was just a regular size band-aid covering my belly button incision. The second two were uncomfortable, but not painful. They were the LARGE size band-aids, but were mid-abdomen level so they weren't terrible to remove. The final two, however, made me hold my breath and close my eyes. They were covering the two largest incisions and were below my c-section scar. Not an ideal place for large, very sticky band-aids. Add to that that those were really the only two incisions that were causing any pain at the time and it was just a little stress-inducing. I was pleasantly suprised at how good they all looked though. I only had one incision that had bled at all onto the band-aids. My instructions are to not get too warm and get sweaty until after my 10-day check up. It's July in Kansas... I fully intend to do my best! We had a nice day today, though, so I have taken three trips outside to walk to the neighbor's driveway. That's major progress from yesterday's walks to the kitchen and back.

From what I hear (Gary talked to the doctor afterwards) the surgery went very well and he accomplished all he set out to do. I even have two sheets of pictures, although I haven't yet been able to ascertain what body parts are smiling for the camera. That's not totally correct. I was able to identify my ovaries in their final picture together and also the "after" picture of the left one in the plastic bag. The doctor told Gary he'd explain them to me at my check-up. As for me, I was already loopy by the time we got to the OR and was not ready to wake up when I was in recovery. It was such a pleasant sleep - no dreams, no noise, nothing. I slept off and on all the way home, trying to escape the nausea. By mid-evening I gave in to it, to put it mildly, and decided at 1:30 in the morning that there would be no more strong pain pills for me. Since then I've survived on Motrin & Tylenol. I can stand discomfort much better when there's no underlying nausea. I've made good progress since Wednesday, so hopefully tomorrow will be even better.

I don't think I'll win any races anytime soon. At the moment I'm thankful for loose shorts as I'm so swollen I don't think any of my pants would fit. Hopefully I'll be better than normal in a couple weeks. No pressure...

What's up with us...

Let's get the good news first. Boo lost her first tooth! She's been patiently waiting but finally took matters into her own hands to get that tooth moved out. She spent over an hour wiggling Tuesday evening and ended up with a visit from the Tooth Fairy. Her other tooth had already broken through behind her baby tooth, so it was definitely time to get it out of there.

We have all been fighting (in shifts) a summer cold for the last 3 weeks. Hanny came down with it first, passed it on to her dad & me, and now the twinkies are trying to cough it out of their systems. We've very effectively shared it with every member of my extended family as well. Sorry guys! It's been a tough one to get rid of, but we're managing. The girls don't mind it so much since I sleep on the living room floor with them while they're sick. It's just easier than having to run back & forth from their bedroom when they're coughing or wake up for some other reason. I haven't slept in my own bed since June 22. I'm looking forward to getting into a softer spot, to put it mildly.

I am having surgery next week, and I am not looking forward to it. Well, that's not totally true. I hope that it takes care of the pain I've had for the past couple years, and if it does, it will be worth the worry. It's just difficult for me to give up total control and allow myself to be totally and completely in someone else's hands. I don't like being that vulnerable. I guess it's just a lesson in life, though. I'm confident in the doctor that is doing the surgery and feel totally at ease with him, so that's a plus. I'm sure it will all turn out fine, but since I'm a perpetual worrier I'm sure to worry about this too. At least I'm aware of it and admit it freely. Isn't that the first step to recovery? I'm working on it...

On the plus side, by the time I go through a day of fluids only, surgery day, and a few days of a very light diet, I should be well into the 140's. That might be incentive enough to smile my way through the next week! Okay, so it's not the easiest or most painless route of weight-loss, but I am seeing it in a positive light at least. That takes a little of the worry out of it. The pros are out-weighing the cons at the moment! :)

What a month!

So it's been kind of a long time since I last blogged. Let's see, what has happened? Well, as for me I have apparently broken through that disgusting plateau that had been hovering around since January - yes, January. I really would be happy to just tone up at this point but also wouldn't turn down a little more weight loss if it comes my way without any unhealthy efforts. Oh, yeah, I might want to explain the picture. I bought my first pair of size 8 shorts in the past couple weeks. I didn't just buy them, I WORE them! :) I'm not sure I ever wore a size 8. I'm not sure what I wore growing up, but I don't remember anything before a 9/10. Anyway, it was a HUGE accomplishment and I'm still smiling about it.

We spent a few days in Branson recently and had a great time. The girlies enjoyed miniature golf, seeing and getting their picture taken with Cecil (if you've seen the Presley's, you know who I'm talking about!) and our trip to the Landing for our every-trip visit to the Disney store. It really was a fun trip and one we look forward to taking again in August. Yesterday they had their 5-year well-child check and 4 shots. It wasn't fun for them but they did an awesome job. Obviously there was a trip to Toys 'R Us afterwards (it's conveniently located just a block from the doctor's office) to help ease the pain. They had sore legs last night but are doing fine this morning. Hopefully that continues. They're such big, brave girls!

Big Bird Yoga and Ernie Does Walking

Where do I even begin? I think it's safe to say that my enjoyment of exercise is spreading. Who would've guessed?! Doodle and Boo have a stack of books that they have informed me are all books telling what exercises to do. According to them, Big Bird gives yoga instruction and Ernie imparts his wisdom in the form of a walking workout instruction book. Doodle and Boo are giving many instructions, apparently interpreting for Hanny, who is the lone exerciser at this point. They have my exercise bands, weighted ball and hand weights out so Hanny can exercise appropriately. They've also told her that she needs to bring her drink of water into the living room because "that's what Mama does." She's been doing lunges, jumping jacks, some yoga moves and is really doing pretty well remembering what moves to do. While lifting weights she said, "I'm so full of muscles I'm about to tip over!" Doodle and Boo just keep telling her to "C'mon, exercise!" Okay, it just got better... Apparently they are all three going to exercise now. They all had to go get their drinks to put on the fireplace, but it just gets funnier. Now, they are all three kicking forward and backwards wearing a variety of shoes. Doodle is in some patent leather dress shoes she found this morning. Boo is in some wite fancy sandals and Hanny is in green flip flops. It's just too cute for words. This is what fun really is. It's the enjoyment of the little things. Gotta go - Hanny wants me to feel her muscles... Does it get any better?!